It's interesting how some of the best advice I ever received in life fits in one simple sentence.
One of my past boss once told me, in French: "Plus tu dois dire quelque chose de dur, plus tu dois sourir".
This translates to: "The harder (or harsher) the comment you have to say, the larger the smile".
This changed my working relationship with partners overnight, and for all you wannabee tough guys at the negotiation tables, you should take this advice to heart.
Not only does this behavior reduce tension and enables new partnerships to start off on the right foot, and existing ones to be mended, but it overall shows RESPECT to the other party, which IMO always yields long term positive results.
OFC if the situation gets out of control, you need to be able to shift your communication style to a tougher one. However if you are known to always be cool and able to discuss difficult and sensitive topics in a pretty laid back manner, I can assure you that when you start acting tougher... people will take immediate notice and give you the credibility you need to get your point across.
I'm sure you know business partners or managers that are always yelling or acting pissed off and some that are always relatively laid back and even-tempered.
Well who has the most impact when they start toughening up?
Indeed, it's also a matter of credibility and efficiency imo, there are situations that require tough behavior and other that simply do not at all. I always have the feeling that laid back managers are in control whereas the screaming and pissed off managers try to cover their lack of control and therefore shows they are full of doubts anyhow. If a manager can not deal with simple situation in a calm and thoughtfull manner, then he is not worth much as a leader (still in my opinion, I am no manager and do not have any experience as such).
ReplyDeleteagreed. being cool and collected gives an impression of control, which is always good.
ReplyDelete"I never smile if I can help it. Showing one's teeth is a submission signal in primates. When someone smiles at me, all I see is a chimpanzee begging for it's life."
ReplyDelete-- Dwight Schrute
HAHAHAHA! He should write a book.
ReplyDelete